Moving from Litigation to Collaborative Family Law: Embracing Creative Solutions for Families
As family law attorneys transition from litigation to Collaborative practice, many find themselves explaining the process by emphasizing what clients WON’T experience – no hostile court battles, no expensive discovery fights, no traumatic depositions, and no trial.
While these are certainly benefits, this approach keeps litigation as the reference point and misses an opportunity to showcase what makes Collaborative law truly transformative: it’s incredible potential for creativity. When freed from the constraints of court schedules and traditional legal frameworks, Collaborative attorneys and their clients can craft solutions as unique as the families they serve.
Mei Shih, former litigation family attorney turned Collaborative attorney shares:
“One aspect of Collaborative that clients really appreciate is the shift away from a “you versus me” mindset. In this process, the parties have the opportunity to sit down together and work with a pro team dedicated to helping them navigate their conflict. They can focus on what truly matters—to them and their family. Collaborative law also creates the space to explore deeper underlying motivations, such as understanding why one party feels strongly about keeping the family dog or why they must celebrate every Valentine’s Day with the kids.”
Let’s explore some examples of how Collaborative teams have designed innovative solutions in four key areas.
1) Creative Asset Division
Traditional divorce often reduces property division to a mathematical split, but Collaborative practice allows for more nuanced solutions that honor both emotional and financial attachments.
Examples:
- One spouse had deep emotional ties to the family business but fewer liquid assets. The solution: a gradual transition where they remained as a silent partner with diminishing ownership over five years, while receiving priority distributions to equalize assets.
- A spouse’s passion for their classic car collection was preserved by trading some retirement assets and including an agreement to provide storage and maintenance for their ex-spouse’s remaining car.
2) Re-imagining Spousal Support
Support payments don’t have to follow a rigid monthly schedule. Collaborative teams can design support structures that align with real-life circumstances and goals.
Examples:
- Support tied to the recipient’s educational journey – providing higher support during their nursing program, reducing it during their transition to part-time work, and ending upon full-time employment.
- For couples with variable income (like sales commissions): creating flexible arrangements with a base support amount plus a percentage of commissions above certain thresholds, adjusting quarterly.
3) Customizing Child Support
Child support in Collaborative cases can move beyond basic calculations to reflect each family’s unique situation and parental strengths.
Example:
- Creating separate “accounts” for different categories of expenses – one parent handling all education-related costs while the other covers medical and extracurricular activities, based on their respective financial strengths and interests.
4) Flexible Parenting Schedules
Rather than defaulting to standard alternate weekend arrangements, Collaborative teams can design schedules that truly work for each family.
Examples:
- For a firefighter parent working 24/48 shifts: creating rotating calendars that maximize their off-duty time with children.
- Accommodating a child’s competitive swimming schedule by having them stay primarily with the parent living closer to the training facility during competition season, then switching to more equal time in off-season.
- Creating “milestone sharing” agreements where parents alternate important events based on work schedules rather than strict alternating years.
The Power of Possibility
These examples only scratch the surface of what’s possible in Collaborative practice. By focusing on the creative potential rather than the adversarial aspects we’re leaving behind, attorneys can help clients see the true value of choosing collaboration.
Each family’s situation presents an opportunity for innovation. When we move beyond the constraints of traditional litigation thinking, we open up a world of possibilities for solutions that truly serve families’ needs.
This creative freedom, combined with the Collaborative process’s focus on understanding underlying interests and maintaining relationships, allows us to craft agreements that not only resolve the immediate issues but set families up for long-term success.
Meg Gluckman
Meg Gluckman is a divorce & co-parenting coach specializing in working 1-on-1 with parents to navigate separation and divorce. She especially loves supporting parents who are using the Collaborative process.
